Unofficial Official 2013 NFL Season Thread

[S]

Listen up Seattle! You are now ON NOTICE!

Friends, Posters, Random people like Natureboy viewing this thread, lend me your beers.

This week begins anew the NFL Season. A time in which our hearts and minds turn from beaches and bikinis to large sweaty men hitting one another on a field of plastic grass. A time when Sundays no longer mean mowing the lawn just to escape the horrors of our pathetic domesticated existence, if only for a moment.

I submit to you on this day that football is our liberation. This week, we take back our balls.

First up on my teams schedule and inevitable road to glory is the provincial town of Seattle. This suburb of Vancouver is best known for its god awful weather, and foul coffee. Seattle residents, yes i'm talking to you Tubbs, are known to try their best to acclimate to American culture by watching our national past time, football.

This Sunday, the Seattle Seahawks fall victim to the Carolina Panthers and serve as a sacrifice to the gods of football. Their inferior cast of players, while heralded in the media, are nothing more than paper puppets pathetically perpetuating the practice of pomposity.

Men, look at their shiny unblemished exterior. I say beneath that vomit green veneer is weakness. Weakness is meant to be exploited.

And exploit it... we shall.

This season the Panthers have put together a group of individuals whose skills mesh into what will be known as the greatest team of all time!

Good day.

[MaddMatter]

There is no way S thought/wrote this all by himself.

[BaltRavensFan20]

There is no way S thought/wrote this all by himself.

I'm trying to figure this out also....its certainly possible... 

[MASTRxOFxPUPPETZ]

There is no way S thought/wrote this all by himself.

[S]

There is no way S thought/wrote this all by himself.

I'm trying to figure this out also....its certainly possible... 

ive been in college for a week. Im educated..  

[tubbs51]

Nigga please. You aint edumacated.

And for what its worth, i live on the other side of the state of Washington where the weather is wonderful after Feburary but before November and the coffee and beer are both local only and delicious. Where you can get stabbed by meth heads and shot by police in the same day or get taser'd to death. Home of the overrated current originators of the term Cinderella where it nips at the asses of Harvard and Yale for Law School success and the home of a dead singer m0st sadly dont remember by the name of Bing Crosby and the home and birthplace of a heralded but now retired Kicker that shared a similar name to a puppet master who is long dead.




Fuck you S. Bring it bitch. Seahawks Defense will man handle Newton and will run all over the vaunted rookie defensive line with pride and will show that 10am means shit to the Northwest. We've been hipsters and being bad at 10 am isnt hip. Its common place. We Washingtonians dont like to go with the grain. Fuck that shit. We'll swim up streams like the mightily delicious Salmon and deliver a thumping heard roun' the world .

[S]

Nigga please.

[Thadden]

I went to Seattle this summer. The weather was actually amazing and it was one of the best cities I've ever been to. Very clean, good restaurants. Random...

Im done

[S]

I went to Seattle this summer. The weather was actually amazing and it was one of the best cities I've ever been to. Very clean, good restaurants. Random...

Im done

Stop trying to falsify my stolen speech

[EPICxPENGUIN69]

are you doing college ball or no?

[S]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

[EPICxPENGUIN69]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

[S]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

oh am I playing lolno. Funny thing about this is that I was at the game last week and i'm sitting in the stands like "i'm better than all these kids", if I had actually been dedicated n shit I would have easily been a d1 prospect, just because i'm so naturally good at football. you know what I mean

[MaddMatter]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

oh am I playing lolno. Funny thing about this is that I was at the game last week and i'm sitting in the stands like "i'm better than all these kids", if I had actually been dedicated n shit I would have easily been a d1 prospect, just because i'm so naturally good at football. you know what I mean

I can count the number of snaps you played on one hand lol

[S]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

oh am I playing lolno. Funny thing about this is that I was at the game last week and i'm sitting in the stands like "i'm better than all these kids", if I had actually been dedicated n shit I would have easily been a d1 prospect, just because i'm so naturally good at football. you know what I mean

I can count the number of snaps you played on one hand lol

No you cant, but anywho thats what i'm saying man. My high school career was a load of baloni(I know its spelled wrong). Like dude if I was a solid 6 foot at least 180 or something I could have been a beast. Like idk its weird

[MaddMatter]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

oh am I playing lolno. Funny thing about this is that I was at the game last week and i'm sitting in the stands like "i'm better than all these kids", if I had actually been dedicated n shit I would have easily been a d1 prospect, just because i'm so naturally good at football. you know what I mean

I can count the number of snaps you played on one hand lol

No you cant, but anywho thats what i'm saying man. My high school career was a load of baloni(I know its spelled wrong). Like dude if I was a solid 6 foot at least 180 or something I could have been a beast. Like idk its weird

If I was 5 inches taller and had 10-15 more pounds of muscle on me I'd be a beast to.

But alas, I'm only 5'7.

[S]

are you doing college ball or no?

wat

thats a no, i thought you were playing college football

oh am I playing lolno. Funny thing about this is that I was at the game last week and i'm sitting in the stands like "i'm better than all these kids", if I had actually been dedicated n shit I would have easily been a d1 prospect, just because i'm so naturally good at football. you know what I mean

I can count the number of snaps you played on one hand lol

No you cant, but anywho thats what i'm saying man. My high school career was a load of baloni(I know its spelled wrong). Like dude if I was a solid 6 foot at least 180 or something I could have been a beast. Like idk its weird

If I was 5 inches taller and had 10-15 more pounds of muscle on me I'd be a beast to.

But alas, I'm only 5'7.

See you get what i'm saying

[S]

Guys ill be at the game tomorrow. Dope

[MASTRxOFxPUPPETZ]

Guys imma Dope for going to the game tommorow

fixed

[S]

Guys imma Dope for going to the game tommorow

fixed

that too

[RSoxGuy]

I refuse to post in any ill conceived, UN-official threads. Ohh wait...

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